I'll let you in on a little secret.. It hasn't been the best week in many ways.. A couple of days before Jace's surgery I had a dream that he didn't come out of Anesthetic.. (and so died)... A nightmare for any parent.. Part of it comes from the fact that my grandma.. with heart issues never awoke from her surgery.. (understandable at 85), part of it was the words of Jace's Anesthetist from his last surgery in January 2010 who said.. "i make no promises.. he's a heart patient, and we're dealing with an airway issue".. and part of it is just that -worry mom gene.. Non the less Tuesday was spent mostly crying.. However.. the upside is that I treated him like there was no guarantees about tomorrow... I was never too busy to pick him up, hug him, read him a story and all those things that sometimes get in the way of our dedication to our kids.. Not to say that this is possible all the time, and not to undermine the fact that kids even at a small age need to understand that they are not the center of the universe... but I want to do this more... I want to treat my kids ... as if I didn't have tomorrow.. I want to spend more time savoring their absolute cuteness... Anyways after the last couple of days of immense priviledge.. i feel like my heart is FULL... and especially at the intense JOY we had bringing him home yesterday afternoon..
P.S. They did a Bronchoscopy to see what his scar tissue was doing.. (they had intended to also do some lazer treatment on it.. but found that it had only grew 2 mm .. (still a bit for a tiny 2 year old airway) but not enough to risk lazering (which could cause more scar tissue) ... So ... a bit of blood coming from his throat, and a couple of freezies later we were done.. I have to admit my kid is the cutest.. gave his nurse a hug, and waved bye bye going to the OR and leaving (like he was king.. )
I also have to say again how amazing our health care system is.. Even the anesthetist took time out of her busy schedule to calm the fears of this very worried mom.. explain what she was going to do again... ensure he came out of recovery fine... We live in an amazing country..
8 comments:
Oh Mama's have the toughest job in the world...and you are doing a great job!!
Glad all is will with the little Bear...
You left me teary eyed after reading this. Yes a moms job is something that can be difficult and nervewracking...and yet so immensely rewarding. He is so lucky to have you as a mom!!
Amen to the title and all you wrote... I need to remember to do that too. Thanks for the reminder! So glad lil' Jace is doing good!
*hugs*
So glad Jace is doing good and recovery went well...good eye opener so savor every moment :) thnx
sorry "to" savor every moment :)
I understand the fear... makes me ill. You are an amazing strong mom. Thanks for the heartfelt post.
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